Saturday, January 3, 2009

My dog is out to get me

Alright so he doesn't look completely evil here, but I swear that he is trying to spite me. I'll give you the quick run down of his life. So I got Bruiser September of '07 while I was living with the ex. Shortly thereafter we broke up and I moved out. I moved into a palisade (that's how I like to describe it) of a studio where the only window looked out on a brick wall. So for 6 months during the winter last year, I could not see daylight from my apartment. Oh no, it wasn't depressing at all. God forbid I tried cooking something with garlic, and the garlic lingered for days. Don't be jealous! So it was just me and Bruise, holding down the fort. Oh, I forgot to mention that I had a mattress on the floor. So he could get on my bed, and sometimes he would pee on it just to piss me off (no pun intended). The BEST part of this studio was that laundry was $1.50 to wash, and another $1.50 to dry. Who has that many quarters on hand? I would have to make multiple trips per month to the bank to get rolls of quarters. So you can imagine my anger when at 10:00pm I find pee in my bed, and 0 quarters in my pocket.
Now let's take a quick look at his tough and hard knock life. Ever since he was like 10 weeks old, I have been taking him to work with me EVERY DAY. Yes, that's right. He gets to play with his only dog friend, Milo, and run around in our office all day. So he doesn't sit at home being bored, he is active. I have enough treats and healthy food for him to last a lifetime. Then even if we are home, I have 3 roommates for him to play with. Sometimes I will send him off to my parent's house, Camp "K", because he LOVES it. He gets to go outside and run around in the backyard with my 2 other dogs, play catch with my dad and probably get better snacks than he does here. Long story short, he lives a great little life but I definitely punish him if he needs it.
I digress, the whole point of this post is that while trying to watch TV in my bed last night I roll over to find my remotes wet. I freak out and assume that obviously there must have been a leak in the ceiling, dripping onto my bed. NOPE. It's urine. And at 1 am in the morning, there is no way I'm washing sheets/comforters. So I go to bed angry, and pretty much sleeping in pee. This is all on top of the fact that my 2 roommates downstairs have been finding little "gifts" around the basement.
When I was gone over the holidays, he stayed with my 2 roommates, Carrie and Eileen. And he went home with Eileen for actual Christmas. Now, I don't know if he's just mad at me because I left him and screwed up his schedule. Or he's just mad because he doesn't have a steady father figure. But he has definitely not been acting appropriately lately. Aside from trying to ruin my life one pee at a time, he is actually a really good little dog.


KatieSaysSo said...

Omg your dogs name is Bruiser? So is mine!!! haha...

Such a cute picture!

Kyla Bea said...

Oh no!!

I always have to do the "Is my puppy being loving because he loves me, or because he DESPERATELY needs to go pee?" check.

I hate to admit it, but usually he needs the bathroom. Good luck with the little guy!

michael said...

I think you're just a terrible mother.

EMD said...

After reading this post, I couldn't help but think back to all the times my lab did this to me when I left town or he just felt the need for attention. Cute doggy! Nooo baaad doggy! Haha