Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Here is Kathy Griffin at a proposition 8 protest. She's hilarious and I cannot wait for My Life on the D List to come back on (tied with Flipping Out).
I, myself, am extremely sensitive to the gays, example from a phone conversation last night:
On the phone with my lesbian friend:
Me: Are you scissoring right now?
R: What? No? Bah! Alright but really, its me and my girlfriend's one year anniversary coming up, what should I get her? I went to the mall to get her something... but I ended up buying myself hairspray instead.
Me: I don't know what you people want? Overalls? a ratchet set?
R: She already has one.
Me: A scooter?
R: I want one! I'm not getting her one!
Me: Oh... So are you guys going to get married?
R: Not anytime soon, but we've talked about it.
Me: Have you talked about who will carry the child, or will you both do it like that Cat Cora?
R: Oh I SAW that, isn't she awful? But no, my girlfriend can't have kids... but can you imagine me pregnant?
Me: Absolutely not, can you imagine how expensive your child's nose job will be?
R: Oh I know, right? We'd have to do that early on. PS You should talk.
Yes, this is how we talk to each other. She calls me Smigel because of the similarities between our hair... Its love all around.
Hilarious quote right around the 1:38 mark.
|The Colbert Report||Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c|
|Narcissistic Personality Disorder - Emily Yoffe|
Monday, March 30, 2009
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
"Soooo what is the Sport and Social club?"
Ugh. I do not have time for this. "Oh, I have no idea- I got the shirt for free"
"Ohhh haha well I was really curious, it sounds cool"
"Yeah...welp I'm sure it is..."
"Well I'm [insert generic boy name] let me know if you ever find out."
mmmkkk. Great conversation about nothing. Good day to you.
18 minutes later, I decide that I've had enough of the elliptical and the gym. Let's be realistic, the only reason I went to the gym was to go tanning as I look like prune. I do a handful of situps and head into the locker room to grab my stuff. While walking up to the desk, I see Brian/John/Mike whatever his name was staring at me with his hands up and a fake confused look.
"What? That was like the SHORTEST workout ever!"
I debated telling him my whole life story as my excuse- how I haven't worked out in a couple months because I spend much of my free time with my new boyfriend and how I had just gotten over what could possibly have been the black lung disease last week and how work has been pretty busy and how I'm in the pre-spring funk etc.
But instead I just said: "Ha yeah, I'm over it...I have to go tanning"
He laughs and gestures towards me while getting this other trainer's attention,
"Sara, she just did like the shortest workout of all time"
Sara replies with "Haha well tanning is important!"
I awkwardly laugh and agree.
Sir. How dare you call attention to my obvious lack of self motivation. I see nothing wrong with an 18 minute "workout." Rude.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
May 2006: Pack my life into 2 suitcases and move down the Club Med in Florida.
*during that year I lived in maybe 2 or 3 different rooms and lived with: Treyanna, then Marie-Eve, then Joey, then Camila, then the ex and I could easily be forgetting people. Its a pretty transient place.
May 2007: Pack my Club Med life into 3 suitcases and head home to good old Illinois.
July 2007: Move into an apartment downtown with the ex. (brilliant idea)
November 2007: Move out of apartment with the ex and into a studio with one window looking at a brick wall for a sublease.
May 2008: Move into a 4 bedroom with my 3 roomies.
And thrown in an entire office move that I had to coordinate at the beginning of this year and that brings us up to speed.
So my roommate Carrie and I are currently doing the apartment hunt game which is awful. No luck yet, so if anyone knows of any good 2 bedrooms in Chicago for a 5/1 lease, let me know!
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Monday, March 16, 2009
Friday, March 13, 2009
Thursday, March 12, 2009
1. Myself - 17,100,000 (k...)
2. Twilight - 13,600,000 (You will change your minds after seeing this GQ cover!)
3. George Bush - 7,090,000 (eh its over)
4. The Beatles - 5,420,000 (my brother would not be amused to hear this one)
5. Bono - 1,550,000 (I'm sort of over him)
6. Chris Martin - 1,520,000 (I do enjoy Coldplay when I'm depressed, but I don't trust any man skinnier than me)
7. Rachel Zoe - 591,000 (HOW DARE YOU! SHE IS MAGNIFICENT!)
8. Sarah Jessica Parker - 496,000 (I still like her even though she's getting a little long in the teeth...literally and figuratively)
9. Stephen Fowler - 397,000 (I somehow missed this Wife Swap episode but did watch some clips- and when I wasn't laughing, I was almost offended).
10. Madonna - 276,000 (She's outrageous but if I ever saw her in real life, I would chase her down the street and probably cry)
Now I did my own little Google search and these are the top ones that came up:
1) I Hate this part lyrics (I'm over this song already)
2) I Hate the Dark Knight (I thought people liked this movie?)
3) I Hate high school (It was not nearly as bad as middle school)
4) I Hate Breaking Dawn (The only Twilight book with sex in it?!)
5) I Hate college (wtf is wrong with you?)
6) I Hated Hated Hated this movie (Roger Ebert's book...who cares?)
7) I hate Indiana Jones 4 (Everyone did)
8) I Hate High School Musical (How could you hate anything with that closeted raging homo Zac Efron in it?)
9) I Hated Bush before it was cool (k..you win)
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
How did I not know that a group like this existed? Everyone at Kitchen Lunch Club knew all about it. And Michael tried to get me to write letters to the prisoners. I will pass on that. I am, however, still debating taking up a hobby writing to these guys.
Monday, March 9, 2009
I did not know that all the self confidence I needed was in a hair bump. I really want FAB hair so I was seriously tempted into these. However, I seriously do not have enough hair to even cover the "mini Bumpits."
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
(It's all about the Bacon)
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
1) Background story: I was contacted by a casting producer for this show to have me on. It went so far as us talking on the phone a couple times and I asked her all about the show etc. They don't pay you a cent, don't do hair/makeup anything, you have to be available for 6 weeks off of work, etc. I almost applied and then decided that I was too lazy to send in a video and pictures etc. I just don't care that much. I imagine that if I had have gotten on, I would have been beyond awkward. But either way, this is probably why I was so obsessed with this season. We loved Jason after the Bachelorette (who didn't) so we did stalk out his work phone number just to call it. What? Not weird at all.
2) I already knew the ending. I found out a few weeks ago who "wins" and then a couple weeks ago there were the rumors about him picking one and then changing his mind. This did not change the fact that I was DYING last night.
3) I didn't like Melissa at first- she was too bubbly, but she grew on me.
4) How WEIRD was last night?!? First of all, what a fucking loser. He cried maybe 59 times last night and I just couldn't stand it any longer. You should cry, because you're an ass.
5) There is nothing I enjoy more than checking out his Myspace and all of the crazies giving their opinions about the show. I've checked it this whole season and people are hilarious. I mean there are people supporting him fully, there are people who are pissed, some blame ABC for everything. Its hilarious! "Leave Jason alone!" and "I am sooo disappointed in you, Jason!" Meanwhile he's down about a thousand friends on Myspace- don't ask how/why I know this.
6) Now my whole night is going to be spent waiting for the After the Final Rose Part 2.
7) I am positive that ABC will approach Melissa to have her on as the next Bachelorette. But I really wonder if she would actually go through with that? I sort of feel like she would make the decision not to- but in the end I'll bet she does it with a bunch of stipulations.
Sorry about my rant, I just love what a loser he is.